Maybe There's Hope

Hamas rapes and tortures women, kills and beheads men and children and we have celebrities like Susan Sarandon telling us how bad the people are who were raped and murdered. Reminds me of listening to Truman Capote one night on the old Johnny Carson Show. He made an awfully good case that being intelligent and being an actor are mutually exclusive. Now, over fifty years later, Sarandon is proving that hasn't change. Personally, I've never seen an actor demonstrate any expertise in anything other than pretending to be someone they are not. Con men do the same thing and go to jail for it. There's a lesson there but a lot of people just can't seem to learn it and they keep believing everything celebrities say. Apparently, intelligence isn't only mutually exclusive with acting.

Speaking of lack of intelligence, the terrorists believe that if they die for the sake of their religion they'll go straight to paradise where they'll be rewarded with 72 virgins. Either that's a misconception or Allah is quite the prankster. Imagine spending eternity with 72 virgins. For the first few thousand years they'll be squabbling with each other. Then they'll turn their attention to Mister Terrorist. For the rest of eternity at least 71 of them are going be in a bad mood and yakking at him about every shortcoming he has and some he doesn't. Buddy, your only hope is that the UTW (United Terror Workers) strike for better compensation or at least renegotiate to allow some women with a few miles on them to infiltrate the celibate 72. They'll have the maturity and patience to keep the virgins in line, something no man could ever do. Besides, there's nothing quite as wonderful as the loving touch of a mature woman and that experience could cut the virgins' learning curve by millions of years.

Worst of all are the college and university students around the country demonstrating against Israel. They say that Israel had it coming. I think I could make a case for either side when it comes to who has the right to the real estate in question but I don't envision either side leaving any time soon so compromise seems to be the only rational solution. Beginning with a UN resolution in 1947, there have been attempts at a two-state compromise. Israel agreed but the Arabs rejected the plan and started shooting. That alone tips the scale to Israel. But even if you subscribe to the Arab point of view, when did it become acceptable to rape and torture women and murder little children? And where the hell are all those college students who were demonstrating in support of the Me-Too movement? They must have all died and gone to terrorist heaven where they now aspire to becoming part of privileged 72 and are eagerly awaiting new Hamas arrivals.

Actually, I suspect they just found a more important cause that is taking up all their time, student loan forgiveness. Of course, the loans are never going to be forgiven. Somebody is going to pay. If no one else, the taxpayers. What they really want is student loan “shifting” so somebody else repays the loans. And anyone will do as long as it isn't them. Fortunately, unlike the Palestinian issue, there is a rational solution for the student loans that ought to satisfy just about everyone including the students. The loans were paid to the institutions in return for providing an educate to the students. With students demonstrating about something they know nothing about, with students believing that raping women and killing children is acceptable behavior, with students believing they shouldn't be held accountable for their debts, with ALL the woke stupidity that is occurring on campus today, it is agonizingly obvious that colleges and universities have failed to satisfy their part of the contract. Instead of teaching them to think critically, they're teaching them to be useful idiots. And when a breach of contract occurs, the party that caused the breach is liable. Therefore, the colleges and universities should be required to repay the student loans. And all the other tuition they took under false pretenses.

Oddly enough, all this nonsense gives me that warm and fuzzy feeling called hope. Now that the students and faculty are attacking each other and turning on the college administrators, maybe they'll all cancel each other out. And with the woke/cancel culture gone, civility can return and the rest of us can live happily ever after.

Lee Volenec

The archenemy of spin.

Read More on Opinion
Volume 16, Issue 1, Posted 2:00 PM, 01.01.2024